August 2020

For Ryan’s 40th birthday, we redid his apartment on the side of our house.  His brother was hired to do most of the work, Ry was his assistant and also did a lot of the painting.

What I hadn’t expected, was that he had strong opinions on how the rooms were going to be done.  That is when I discovered that he was a HGTV addict.  And had some good ideas as well as good taste.

After our son was gone, my husband started spending time up in the apartment, feeling close to Ryan while he read a book or just sat and thought.  We decided to make the room more functional as a guest room, or a place we could spend time in, while keeping Ryan’s original design choices.

Being in Ryan’s home felt good, and we took our time, deep cleaning, moving things around, hanging stuff.  It was nice to have a reason to be there, and we wanted to make the space more of a part of our home.  Kind of as a way to keep him close.  

I didn’t change the bathroom at all.  I kind of wanted to hang different artwork, but the painting is one I did of a view from the Wyoming lake house vacation that he went on with us.  The colors don’t match the room, but he sat with me as I painted it and he loved that piece of art.

I would like to do a mosaic to hang on the front of the TV cabinet.  Maybe later.

The chair is one that I had in the main house, but thought it looked better up here.

The framed, vintage, cardinal print is something that will always remind me of him.  We have had a cardinal that has pecked at and attacked our windows since last October.  He became Ryan’s nemesis and we all laughed about their war for months.

That’s why I put the ceramic red bird on his coffee table.  
We named the persistent bird, Malarkey, after a contestant on Top Chef last season.

Ryan was a cook and loved the show.  But he could not stand that guy, because Malarkey was a show off, bragging type who always ran his mouth and sometimes spoke badly of other contestants.  

Ryan himself was a hard worker who believed in doing the tough jobs, not talking about doing them. He had no respect for guys like Malarkey and we used to cross our fingers and cheer for him to pack his knives and go each week.

It took us a while to watch the rest of the series after we lost our Ryan.  And when Malarkey finally left, Rich and I cried as we applauded the decision.

So now, Malarkey the red bird is represented in Ry’s apartment as a reminder of how many laughs we had together over both.  

The purple statice was dried from a place floral arrangement sent by a nephew.  

The multi color vases by the TV were saved from bouquets sent after Ryan died too.  I kept all of the vases and have plans to mosaic some of them.

The far wall is where the mini home gym once was.  We already have a workout area in the office, so changed this to a dining spot.  

If some day, a grand fairy moves in, or if needed for some other reason, we can bring in a small fridge and microwave.  For now, a gate leg table from the hearth room and a couple chairs from the studio were enough.

Speaking of grand fairies moving in, Sugarwings discovered the XBox and now calls this her apartment when she goes up to play it.  Ryan would get a kick out of that.

I found these curtains at Walmart for $5 a pair, and they suit the room nicely.  

The bedspread isn’t as ideal, but was one I already had.  It’s okay, but I might look around for something a bit more “farmhouse-ish”.  The bedside lamp was $2 at Goodwill, and the headboard $100 from Nebraska Furniture Mart.

He already had the quilt there, it was one my mom made for him from some scraps leftover of clothes she’d sewn for him as a kid.

I had the mirror/window in the breezeway for over a decade and was ready for a change.  It goes well here.

The curtains actually match better in person than they seem to in the photo.  He had picked them out with me.

The print on the wall is from a painting I had done.  It also reminds me of my boy, but in a convoluted way.  When Ryan had to have his gallbladder removed, and we spent days at the hospital while he recovered from a serious infection, we roamed the halls quite a bit to stretch our legs.  While exploring, I was surprised to see the original of this hanging through the window of an office.  

This picture will always make me think of those days hanging out at the hospital with him.

This is sentimental too.  When I was on a pour paint kick, Ryan was my biggest fan.  I couldn’t convince him to do one with me, but he did keep me company and chose colors for me to make some pieces for his place.

He liked them so much, that he had a few too many hanging around.  I gave some away to people who cared about him and saved a couple that I have cut up to make into a photo album cover.  I’ve already been sorting photos of him and am impatiently waiting til I have time to create the book.

While redoing, I touched up the paint that was nicked in a few spots and repainted his front door.  As I redid the entry, I pictured how happy Ryan would’ve been if I’d done that one day while he was at work. 

I can just hear the excitement in his voice as discovered the fresh paint and he thanked me.  

He was so appreciative of every little thing.  So much so, that he made doing things for him very rewarding, he was so pleased by it.  There wasn’t a single meal he ate that he didn’t compliment me on and thank me.  Every single dinner would get a “Thank you, Mom, that was good”.

I could tell if he really, really liked it, because the phrase would become, “Thank you, Mom, that was goooooood!”

I think he would like knowing that we are visiting his little home and spending time there.  I wish I could tell him, “Thank you for your decorating choices, Ryan.  They are gooooooood!”