family

Last weekend we took advantage of a way above average Spring day and hit the lake for a ride.  We needed action photos of our boat to get her sold, and that was an ideal day to do it.

For this shot, Sugarwings and I were dropped off at the shoreline.  Which isn’t as simple as that sounds.  The water was cold and there is no dock, only a rocky, slippery shallow spot.  The boat only has seconds to pause for us to jump out before it has to back out and avoid rocks.

We managed.  I had no worries about the nimble Grandfairy, it was my old lady qualities that made me leery about making a quick go of leaping down and not falling with a big, freezing splash.  I was fine, all went well, plus it made me lose any lingering doubts about selling our boat.

Even after 28 years of pontooning, I still stressed about what could go wrong. Because things can go wrong.  We have hit our propeller on rocks before, lost ladders, had engine trouble and were stranded, it all happens no matter how capable and skilled you are at handling the big, ole, floating thing.  So, I’d often have nagging stresses during many maneuvers, and not be relaxed like a person should be while out on the water.

But this day?  It was a very nice one.  Honestly, 99% of them are, gliding across the lake while kids giggled on a tube has been a major pastime for us since this one came into our lives.  Sugarwings was raised as a lake person.  

Surprisingly, mid-April in KS proved to be a spectacular day for one last spin on the tube too. The water was way too frigid for a swim, but this kid is such an expert tuber, they were not going to fall in and were happy to have a good bye loop across the waves.

I got the boat sparkling clean, took lots of photos, then made ads on marketplace and Craigslist, thinking we’d be in for a couple weeks of haggles and tire (or pontoon) kickers. But nope, we were inundated with messages, that it was impossible to keep up with and that boat sold immediately!  How lucky for us.  

We had such happy memories out on that lake, my husband could pull kids and other family members nonstop for hours.  I have packed tons of picnics, and we’ve had years of laughter out there.  I was very surprised that Rich wanted to sell it, but with so much of our family moved away, it always seemed like too much work just for the two of us.  And when we would go out with friends for wine and sunsets, coming home and putting it all away after dark was a hassle, and we enjoy our friends every bit us much having a glass of wine in the garden.

So it was time, at least close to being time.  We wanted to sell while it still had value and we could get some cash out of the deal.  In retirement, that matters more than ever.

I did feel bad for Sugarwings, that kid not only had a big chunk of the family move away, now we have given up the boat because they are gone.  But that sweet child is so understanding and knows it was a tough decision to make and that some of the cash will go for trips and other fun things we do together.

We have been a boating family since way before I had a digital camera, so there aren’t any photos of our first years on the water. 

But there are many special pictures.

And so many special moments.

Today is Bobbie’s service.

This is a little sketch I did for her, of a phrase the family repeated and followed. “Valentine Strong” was represented by the dedication and love my nieces showed their mom through her struggles and illness.

By Bobbie’s husband, Doug, taking such loving care of her through his own battle with dementia.

And the phrase shone bright in Bobbie’s eyes as she was determined to appreciate her last weeks and all of the people she loved.

My sister was brave, strong, and never complained. I was so proud of her and her entire family.  I cherish the time I had with all of them at this turning point in our lives. 

My sister, Bobbie, took things slow.  Literally, she moved slowly in all matters, and I’d often find myself 20’ ahead of her wherever we went. Or perusing the dessert menu as she started in on her salad.  But her slowpoke tendencies weren’t simply due to not moving fast. 

Bobbie savored life.  She was mindful and present in every thing she did.  She took her time and enjoyed every bite of a meal, looked at the sky for pretty clouds as she walked along, or at the ground for a lucky penny someone might have dropped.  (Her daughters knew this trait and would encourage it by secretly tossing coins down ahead of her.  Did Bobbie know they were teasing? Or did she just enjoy the treasure hunt?  She’d end up with pockets full of change, either way).

Every step along her path there was something to be taken in, looked for, or appreciated.

Life was always a treasure hunt for Bobbie.  Like a magpie, she’d gather up sparkly objects like twinkle lights, holographic pieces, and her favorite- diamonds. Then  fill her nest with items that pleased her.

Little did she know, that the greatest treasure of all was herself.  She was such a fun companion, a person who would always listen, never judge.  A person with a sharp wit, always ready with a quick joke or a pun.  Someone who enjoyed sharing laughter and pure silliness, who never missed a touristy photo op to pose by. 

If there was a ten foot tall ice cream cone, a gaping jawed, giant shark, or a one eyed pirate statue in front of a building, Bobbie has a photo of herself with it.

Multiple photos, too.  No matter how the pictures turned out, deleting was not allowed.  She treasured every snap a camera grabbed, because each represented more to her than just a likeness.  Every photo held a history of what just passed. They were a keepsake of a moment of joy, or someone she loved.

Bobbie’s love of history was a gift to all of us.  She researched, gathered information, and as many photos as she could to build family stories and share her finds with all of her relatives. While  record keeping with an artful flair, she made genealogy books and recipe collections that brought the past into the present.   

Her silly side had  her playing with pictures and using her own photo magic to create entertaining scrapbooks and cards. She loved editing photos and making cards signed with love.  Those cards were sent for birthdays, congratulations, or sympathy, and to everyone she cared about.  There was sincerity and thoughtfulness in every envelope she addressed.  Because of all things, Bobbie was loyal.  If you were her friend or her family, you had her loyalty.  She shared in your joys and sorrows.

Bobbie genuinely cared deeply for the people in her world, and they could always feel it.  When she gave you a hug, or told you that she loved you, you felt it in your soul.  The word “heartfelt” suits her to a t. She was calm and gentle on the surface, but her feelings for family, and all of those that she cared for were fierce, and strong in her heart.