Isn’t this oyster shell the perfect little pinafore dress for this sprite? It even has a pocket! And I was so happy to find the striped booties, ready to be slipped onto her tiny feet.
We sure enjoyed the St Augustine beaches!
We were able to drive on the sand, and could haul a day’s worth of tents, dog kennels, chairs, etc. so we had everything we needed with us. 
With three dogs, we couldn’t have carried it all and managed them too. At other beaches we chose to take the pups for long walks then leave. Being able to have a vehicle near where we wanted to hang for the day completely changed how we could spend the days.
Oh, those dogs still got plenty of walking, too. And we had all the comforts and shade we needed to enjoy our books in the sea air. We had lots of time for relaxing and making seashell fairies!
A bird shaped rock! Isn’t it cool? Well, the front is head, back and wing shaped, the tail part is a second rock and they just kind of slid together perfectly to create a bird.
I was so excited to see it on the shore of our lake.
Then I found a dinner plate sized heart rock with a hag stone hole in it. This was my lucky day.
And a beautiful day at that.
A great afternoon for the trails around the lake.
The dogs thought it was their lucky day too.
Asheville, NC is home to some kick ass waterfalls, and while visiting, we trekked down to the base of one and spent some time playing in the water.
That place was over crowded, as I feared many Labor Day vacation spots might be, so I was extra cautious and had the family mask up, even outdoors, when strangers got too near. And did my best to constantly scoot away from people encroaching upon my space as I gathered shiny, quartz rocks to make a fairy to leave by the falls.
Since others simply didn’t seem to understand social distance guidelines, I left the pools at the bottom of the falls and found a cozy, mossy bed away from traffic for this sprite to make her home.
She is in a shady area, so you don’t see how the crystal sparkles in the photo. But she is entirely made of glittery bits and pieces. And look at the itty-bitty, fingertip sized crystal heart that I found for her to hold!
It was the first part I found when I stepped into the clear water, and I created the fairy around that heart.
You can tell how beautiful the water is here. And the rocks shining through were either frosted with mica or crystal. Each was a sparkling treasure.
I didn’t keep any from there, since it was a park. But, I was so tempted. Instead, I left my fairy as a thank you for nature’s blessings to me.
She sits at the end of the trail, right by the first boulders of the pools, so I hope some kids find her there.
Being with my boy, and his daughters in such a magical place was good for my husband and I. Some days are harder than others without Ryan, but no days are easy.
Being in a tranquil spot with loved ones was much needed.
We have been doing some traveling. Yes, I know that in the Time of Corona, that is an iffy thing. But we have a new RV that allows us to avoid all public restrooms and restaurants, we roll with our own kitchen and bathroom. All we need to do is pump gas, then park and picnic inside the bubble of our little home on wheels.
This trip was to Wyoming, where the virus hasn’t become a big threat. We gathered at the spacious lake house we’d gone to before on our big family reunion. This time, the attendance was much smaller, due to the concerns of the plague hanging over us all.
Honestly, I was not a fan of the idea. Shouldn’t we all just stay home, doing our part to stop the spread?
But, my husband and I are dealing with our boy’s death in different ways. I couldn’t even speak to anyone at all for along time, he wants his people around him, and was especially missing his family. Whom I also love, and love to spend time with. It meant a lot to him, he needed his people.
I felt more than a little guilty about indulging ourselves with a vacation/family reunion but knew that this one was about as safe as one could be.
Buying the new camper made me feel pretty secure. And we questioned everyone we were going to be seeing on their practices. Our family members had all been careful, working at home, shopping at early morning senior hours, staying in, etc.
A couple of weeks ago, we took the RV to North Carolina for the grand fairies to see their daddy, and while NC is far from as virus free as the remote lands of Wyoming, that had gone well and had also been very careful there.
So, I took some of Ryan’s ashes from the urn Ed Noonen had gifted us with and carefully packed some in the “to go vase” he had also made. Actually, the small vase was a separate gift, not exactly meant to be a traveling ash container, but it seemed ideal for that purpose. I have mentioned that Ry wasn’t fond of getting out and seeing the world. But when we last vacationed in Casper, he rode along and had a great time.
We had pulled a camper then too. Not because the lake house was too crowded, it sleeps DOZENS, but to provide a private place for him to retreat to if needed. We practically forced him to come and used the fact that it was his grandma’s 85th birthday to guilt him into it.
And we were so glad we did. He joined in, laughed with everyone, took long walks in the hills with me, helped in the kitchen, and even placed pretty high in the ping pong tournament. It was such a pleasure to remember him there with us, that we wanted to spread some of his remains in a spot that had been special to us.
This might sound odd, and might also mean that I am totally losing it, but carefully tending to the ashes, and wrapping them up to take along reminded me of taking care of him as a baby. Geez, why did I even tell you that? I do sound crazy. And grief will do that to you. Maybe I felt like I was doing something for him like I used to when he was just little?
Sugarwings and Dewdrop went hiking with their cousins and all of the girls brought back heart shaped rocks for me.
I do not remember seeing any at all when we were there three years ago. But on this visit? They were abundant.
The largest rock is next to his urn now. The teeniest is wrapped up in a note to him, inside the urn.
When I came across the smaller, almost perfect heart, I knew it would be an ideal bodice along with the larger hearts as wings and skirt, to form an angel for my boy.
There is twisty, weathered wood all around too. I picked up pieces to make a frame around his angel. Then took the ashes out to it, and let Sugarwings sprinkle them over it all.
While I hadn’t thought I needed this trip, like my husband did, I found out that I certainly had. Staying in a unique spot that was full of happy memories and being able to create this angel for Ryan with stones found by the girls was good for me.
As was spending time with two of the dearest sister-in-laws anyone could have. Both of them offered their own big hearts to me when I sobbed.
My husband says the time was healing for him.
I can’t say that for myself. Right now, I don’t see any possibility of ever healing.
But I can say that when people who care about me were there to listen to me talk about our loss, and to show their love, I knew that I had not lost everything. It is good to feel their love, when I needed it so badly.
I know that with this virus ramping up and raging through our world, not everyone has the luxury of buying an RV to go be near family. Although our son is dead, I still feel blessed for what we do have. And my heart goes out to those who suffer through the loss of the ones they love completely alone due to the isolation we are all going through.
Sugarwings went caving and kayaking with her dad last weekend. While there, she gathered rocks and shells for me, calling it a “fairy kit to go”.
In the box of pretty rocks, was just what I needed to make an angel for Ryan. Typically, I leave my fairies and angels on beaches, but this one is for Ryan’s room, so I glued her to one of the favorite paintings that he had in there.
A few days before he died, we took one of our long walks together and as I glanced down, I spied a four leaf clover. He and I were both so excited, you’d have thought I’d found a fifty dollar bill, not a leaf. I was using a cane, and had a Twinkle on a leash, so Ryan carefully held that clover throughout the rest of our walk and I pressed it when I got home.
I am still going on my Ryan walks. Usually with Twinkle, sometimes with my husband, always with tears. One walk was with my son, Adam, and I told him about the shamrock. That night, he brought me two that he found for Ryan and I.
Our Great Camping Adventure is going wonderfully. We have had so-so weather some days, and others perfectly lovely. On the extra nice days, we have headed to the beach for walks with the dogs.
While there, I was inspired to make seashell pups instead of my typical fairies or angels. The first one I made washed away with the tide, which felt rather pleasing to see. I liked watching my little creation float off.
It felt like making an offering to the sea.
So I looked around to find a few more bits of shells to whip up another, this time arranging them up higher on the sand.
This one is Twinkle the Yorkie.
And here is Sugar the doodle.
Uhm, you will just have to take my word for it that this is Honey the golden.
Not an anteater.
Maybe I should stick to fairies?
The dogs are loving the beach as much as I do, so I attempted the little shell critters as a beach thank you from them.
Our weather on Christmas Eve and Day was spectacular. Upper 60s? In Kansas on December 24th? You just never know, some years are blizzards, others are meant for being outside.
We found a new trail behind the dog park that lead to the river, and on my first steps along the bank, I spied a rock that looked like an angel wing.
Of course I had to make a Beach Blessings angel as a thank you.
Dewdrop harvested some algae to make the wreath and as I placed it in the angel’s arms, I saw a teensy, heart shaped rock to add to it.
We had two days of walking weather, with various family members going along each day. Kansas might not have gorgeous scenery, but I still appreciate our time in the woods when we can get it.
I would love to live somewhere more interesting, with hills or beaches, but I figure a person should make the most of what they have and look for the best in it. I am lucky to live in a town that cares about making trails for its citizens (and dogs). And am also quite lucky to have a few acres of our own woods to enjoy.
And winter walking weather in Kansas was a pretty nice Christmas present!
i should’ve made a bigger thank you angel…
In honor of the holidays, I made some gnomes and angels instead of fairies.
I was inspired by these broken shells that already looked like toadstools.
The tiny red noses were a lucky find by my nephew, who found a sprig of them washed up on the shore.
Nieces also helped gather shells for me. Shelli saw this “jawbone” and we crafted a Dino as a group project.
See the inspiration?
I think my little gnomes look like they are having a happy, little dance party. They must love Siesta Key as much as I do.
It may have been October when we were at the beach, but my mind was already headed to Christmas because I am hosting A Snowbird’s Song, with a winter, holiday theme.
I saw this curved shell and of course, my mind went right to ELF HAT.
But then, I saw the beard shell, and knew this had to be a gnome.